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Francis “Frank” McCarthy September 07, 1960 ~ January 12, 2020

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Welcome. If you’re reading this, chances are your life has been touched by my brother, Frank. I’m his ‘lil sis’ Sheila 🙂

Frank was/is a warm, and loving son/brother/friend/employee/citizen of the world, and he gave/gives us many reasons to celebrate life in general. So that’s what we are going to do 🎉💓🥳

Details of the Celebration of Frank’s Life

The family will be having a celebration of Frank’s life, (rather than a viewing), Sunday 1/19/20, from 4pm-6pm. Wear anything that would make you feel comfortable and like yourself. (Your enjoyment/comfort would for sure be a priority to Frank.)

The first hour will be filled with pictures of Frank throughout his life and music playing that he liked to jam out to. If you have pictures you’d like to share that would be awesome! You can either bring them Sunday or email them to me sheilabm.csc@gmail.com. I’m looking forward to hearing your favorite, “Can I be Frank?” stories from the time you got to spend with him.

For the second hour we will hear from those who wish to share. And after that, I wouldn’t be surprised if an impromptu ‘after party’ broke out with interested folks going out together to a local establishment.

We’d love to hear from you~ anytime

You have probably had many good times with Frank. But you may not live locally or if you do, you may not feel as comfortable would like with public speaking. No worries, if you would like to have something said on your behalf on Sunday (for any reason—meaning whether you are present or not), please email me, sheilabm.csc@gmail.com and I’d be happy to share your words with those gathered. Likewise you could express your sentiments in the condolences section for all to see. On Sunday, anyone can decide to speak, it’ll all be a very relaxed and fun conversation.

Because we are gathering to celebrate his life, I think it might be of interest to you for me to share the loved-filled, wonder-full experience I had with him as he was passing. My story of that is below. I’m so looking forward to learning more about my brother from the perspectives of others and to the enjoyable gathering on Sunday 💖🙏

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Frank’s Peaceful, Wonder-full Passing

As Frank’s lil sis, I had a front row seat to his lively sense of humor. So, to me, it’s just like Frank to ‘pull a fast one’ by quickly slipping from this world into the next. I can imagine that as his physical experience quickly shifted from uncomfortable to intolerable and prevented him from having a light-hearted, jolly experience, that he signaled ‘check please’.

Last Thursday night he had checked himself into a Vitas facility for symptom management/care. All the staff were so warm and attentive, and I saw him start to relax a bit into being the one that was being cared for (usually he was the one doing the care giving). On Sunday evening, he’d been having a bit of discomfort and restlessness, but he was being soothed by the efforts of his nurses and myself. And then…it was a simple as… one moment, he was being assisted by two wonderful and warm nurses from his chair to his bed, and the next moment he was relaxing into peace and grace. I feel so fortunate to have been there to see all the tension in him dissolve, and his eyes and face take on a boyish, bright, curious, glow that still does my heart good to think about it, because I had the sense that whatever he was experiencing was so wonder-full. Then the nurses, gently placed him on the bed.  And, as he was surrounded by his caregivers and myself, he breathed  a few  final, soft, small breaths, while I reminded him how much he is loved and shared other heart-felt sentiments, and all the while, a warm glow and a palpable sense of peace and well-being surrounded us all and filled the room. And I can feel it still. What a gift that my ever-thoughtful, loving brother gave to me by allowing me to share in that experience. And I’m sharing it now with you all, in the hopes it may lift your spirits and be a touchstone for you.

And now, even though I know technically that Frank is no longer in physical form, his generous, funny, talented personality still feels so very alive to me. I hope you find that to be your experience as well.

Please consider sending a donation to:  gf.me/u/w8wz3w

 

Warmest regards,

Sheila McCarthy Sieusankar

And the whole McCarthy Family

 

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Condolence

Mary

January 14, 2020, 8:21 pm

To the family, my heartfelt condolences for your loss. Please find comfort in the knowledge that soon God will wipe out every tear from our eyes, and “death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”(Rev. 21:3,4) May this promise give you comfort now and a real hope for the future. My deepest sympathies.

Colleen Jolly

January 17, 2020, 12:54 pm

Growing up, my Uncle Frank was the coolest guy I knew. He was the “cool dude in the gold Prelude.” He’d swoop in and take me for rides during which he taught me what it meant to be cool. I learned that stick shifts were cool. The “Time Warp” from “Rocky Horror Picture Show” was super cool. And that scratch-off lotto tickets made the best gifts. Even though we didn’t talk much over the years, he’d always send me a cool card for my birthday and always was there for major events in my life. Once, he came to visit me in DC as part of his “Rock Star” tour around the country visiting family. We went out for Cuban food and ordered mojitos. He’d only ever heard of them from the TV show “Family Guy” and didn’t believe it was a real drink! He kept holding the mojito delicately between two fingers and wiggling his pinky saying “Moooo-heeet-ooo” every time he took a sip. Quick to laugh and with the biggest heart, I miss you Uncle Frank. I miss your ability to find the lightness in every situation and the coolness. I miss your enthusiasm for random Dollar Store finds like the red velvet sombrero that was two sizes too small that randomly showed up on my doorstep one day. I miss your low rumble laugh that was the punctuation on almost every sentence. I miss you Uncle Frank. I love you.

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